Jesus>Religion

I hate talking Religion. I really really do. And I gotta say this video that my cousin posted on Facebook perfectly explains my point. If I could put into words and tell you exactly how I feel, this video would be exactly what I would say.

*Watch the Video first

There was some debate on FB about it but I refrained from commenting even though I really just wanted to bust out and explain what I think. And now a day later I feel like I need to write down my thoughts for my own self.

Let me preface this by telling you my journey. Which is probably in many ways or another similar to that of this man in the video.

I am Catholic. This I know. This I am sure about.

I was baptized into this religion. Baptism means our parents and Godparents will guide us into this faith. Teach us about it. And model it for us. So this foundation was set upon me. All I could do was grow from there. I never remember my parents being my models for my religion but I knew this is what they believed and this is what they followed. On the other hand my Abuelita and Abuelito were the two most influential people in my life when it came to knowing my faith and understanding my religion. I did learn the rules. I learned the prayers. I learned the commandments and what was right and wrong. You go to church on Sundays. For most of my childhood my parents didn't attend church regularly. There were times they did and we all went but for the most part my sister and I attended with our Abuelitos. It was boring, we didn't understand, but even through all that I listened and paid attention. What my parents did do was enroll us into catechism classes and it was there we learned the bible. We learned our faith. And I began to learn how much Jesus loves us. How much God loves. And how much in turn I loved Him. And I continued on this path of learning and growing and I enjoyed it very much. I was blessed to have these wonderful catechism teacher and my Grandparents to be there whenever I had a question or needed some understanding.

When I was 16 I had my confirmation. Confirmation, to confirm my faith and everything that had been taught to me since I was a little girl. Up until this point I knew I did want to be a Catholic person. Someone who would eventually be saved and could join Him when my time came. And in order to do this I had to believe. I had to believe and do everything in my power to be a good person, the person that God planned me to be. I accepted this and agreed to continue on my journey to grow and learn even more what my faith was about. Because I did have faith. And I chose this without the push of my parents or anyone, but with the foundation they gave me as my platform. And I continued on to become a leader for the next years Conformation students. I did this for 2 years. And I loved it. I loved teaching them what I knew and loved learning things I didn't.

Fast forward a year. Due to poor choices I became pregnant. And through the first few months I still maintained my place in the church. I still went regularly, I still helped lead the confirmation classes, and even more I looked for guidance in the words of the bible. I knew it was going to be a challenge and tried to understand it all with the help of my church. But that's not what happened. Instead for the most part, (there were a handful of fantastic people who became my only support throughout this time besides my parents) I was looked down upon. I was out casted. And then I decided to go to confession. I knew what I did was wrong and not of the way it was taught to me. I had a great relationship with the priest at that time and talked about it. He made it clear to me that sinning did not make me a bad person. It made me human. If I was truly sorry for my sin I would be forgiven. The act of going to confession was to be truly sorry and have the intention of not committing sin again. But to live life according to God's plan. And that is what I tried to do. But regardless I took a year off of church because it got to the point that I felt like I was a horrible person for being there. I was treated like I committed a sin and it would stick with me forever and no matter how I tried to right that sin it would never be right.

And my journey in the church life came to an end. Soon after my husband and I started taking classes to be married in the church. And with each and every class we took (we were the youngest couple and the only ones who already had children, 2 at that point) we were out casted further. And constantly questioned indirectly if we should really be getting married through the church. My husband who believe is God and believes in Jesus but has never liked the idea of organized religion. I tried so hard to see it his way but I was taught and raised differently so in my mind I thought there was no other way to do things than the way the church has told us. Even though as much as I tried to get back on track and kept getting knocked down by older adults at church who looked down upon me. I could tell each class would make him more and more uncomfortable and honestly it was doing the same for me. Weren't these the people who should be teaching us and helping us to live our life in accordance to the rules set before us? It made no sense to me. And then one day it did.

It was then that I realized I knew who I was and that I was a good person. I knew that God had forgiven me. I also knew that I may fall back into temptation again but as long as I followed him and continued to try that I was doing just what he wanted of me. And it was then that I decided I didn't want to marry in the church. And we quit. I never went back after that. I felt defeated. And I felt like I was losing my faith. I had so many questions... Why would God make it this impossible to get married and try and fix my life and put it back onto the path that he wanted me to? And that's when I realized it wasn't God. My faith in him had never wavered. But it was the church. The people who walked around like they were better than me and ran the show. It was them who I lost my faith in. It was the church who said, do EXACTLY as we say or else you're wrong.

And that's why I completely understand and agree with this video. I believe the guy could say he was also in a similar position. Putting on a front. Would it be better to go to church every Sunday when everyone can see but commit sin every other day of the week in hiding? I love when he said he doesn't have to hide his sins. Because that what I felt I wasn't doing. Yes I sinned, and yes it was wrong, but I was there to correct it and to learn and move on.

It wasn't until about a year ago when I finally came to a realization. I love my religion and I love being Catholic. But I disliked the church. In the video my favorite line has got to be, "It's not a museum for the good people, it's a hospital for the broken" I believe that's what it should have been for me. A hospital to build me back up not continue to doubt myself and tear me down. Denying the church is not denying God. God knows we're not perfect but the church expects us to be?

With all this said, I did take a step a few weeks ago to register as a member of my church once again. Because through it all and with everything aside it is the foundation of it's teachings that I want my children to learn. I have an almost 9 year old, and he being the oldest, still has no concept of the religion I baptized him into. And I alone cannot answer all his questions. He needs to be taught, as well as my girls, what being a Catholic is all about. And what God did by sending Jesus to us. I hope that all these years later the church can finally show me the acceptance that I always felt I didn't have and then maybe... I can continue to grow and expand once again.

Wish me luck.

Curtsie Boutique

What started off as a little pipe dream has slowly started turning into a small business for me!

Months ago with the push from my best friend Tiffany I decided to start selling my handmade tutus and bows and such. And without any start-up money and just using the enormous amount of ribbon I have collected in the past few years I got to work. First selling to family and close friends. And once I accumulated a bit of cash I started with actually forming it into a business.

Tiff and I both decided to sell out stuff together. I make tutus, bows, flip flops, and accessories. She has been making these adorable pillowcase dresses, and will soon be adding more items to her collection such as aprons!


Tiffany's sweet little dresses

Once I had a good stash going I decided to create a Facebook page to broaden my horizons. And I started receiving custom orders from different states and such! I've had so much fun putting together my creations for many people to enjoy. The feedback I have gotten has been awesome! And now Tiff and I have set up shop at a few craft fairs around the valley. And hope in the new year we can attend and be a part of many more on a regular basis!




Peoria Holiday Sale

If you're interested in purchasing any of our items my store is HERE
I have it up to date with in stock items but we really love custom orders. Match an outfit, occasion, or anything!

And Tiffany's items can be found HERE
My girls own some of these dresses and they're complimented every time they wear them! Paired with my bows and flip flops my girls are just so cute!

My 26th Birthday Halloween Party

Yesterday I celebrated my birthday yet again with a Halloween Party. Woo!

My sister Nichole and my neice Laila


My baby Tal in the costume that both of my olders girls wore their first Halloween that belonged to my neice Brianna who wore it her first Halloween... and she is now 9. My Mom bought it and so I've kept it.


Junior the Mexican Situation and Kika the Sailor!


Matthew the Nerd


Felicia, Jr, and Me


Felicia, James, Kika, and Me

Felicia and James have been my friends since High School and they've been together that long!

With our babies... Atalie and Journey are 2 days apart!


Me, my Daddy, my cousin Alexis, my sister Nichole


Me and my Bestie Tiffany


They are the cutest ever! Her husband Kevin was the bee keeper!


She was a nice bee... no stinger! Just a sweet little bow! (But we know better!)


We're awesome.


Hot Stuff!



Happy Birthday to me!


Happy Birthday to me...


Happy Birthday dear Michelle... (from Loyiel)...


Happy Birthday to me!


Man what a great birthday weekend. I was spoiled beyond belief! Lots of gifts. Lots of cake. Lots of love. Lots of food.

And to top it off my aunt had my uncle make me some pozole and sent me a big huge pot. Seriously I have the most amazing family and friends ever. At first I was bummed because my Mom always made my birthday special... she bought me my outfits, she bought me the perfect gift, she took me to my favorite places, and she cooked me my favorite meal. And this year I wasn't without any of that. She left me in good hands because these people I love... love me just as much!

Gracias Tia Elena y Tio Alfredo por el pozolito! Los quiero mucho!

My 26th Birthday @ Westgate

Friday was my 26th birthday. For the most part it was a lazy day for me. Enjoyed the wonderful weather. Missed my Mom like crazy because I wasn't getting her pozole like every year since I turned 18. It's totally my favorite food ever. :(

But that night we went out to Westgate and boy was that fun!

We started off at Saddle Ranch because they make the best drinks.


Best Sister-in-law ever! Jen and Me!


Me and my good friend since High School Felicia!

Earlier in the week sometime when I wasn't aware my husband had called Jen and had asked her to make me a cake for my birthday... and she showed up to Saddle Ranch with this!

They love me they really love me!


My brother and his beer tower... solely for him...


The King and the Queen


Me and my aunt Kika


They made me take a shot called a blowjob... needless to say I couldn't fit it into my mouth.



After getting our drink on a while we headed over to McFaddens for a more party atmosphere...










He loves me entirely more than I deserve

And then we got kicked out of the bar... I will spare you the details but it wasn't our fault.


Oh well it was only an hour til closing anyway...

I still had a blast!

It's My Birthmonth!

I love October... it's the beginning of my favorite time of year. Not only is my birthday in October... but there's Halloween, Pumpkin Patches, Fall Clothes, Cooler Weather, Parties, Food, Lots of Family Time... I could really go on!

So I'll be 26 on the the 22nd. Holla!

My birthday lands on a friday so I have a weekend of fun planned. Yay! I really can't wait.

And just for fun (okay okay maybe not for fun but I found out my husband reads my blog now so...) I am posting my birthday wish list. It's actually my Holiday wish list. It's just a bunch of random things I want. Hint Hint Honey! ;)

Without further ado... in no particular order:

Macbook - I am currently without a laptop and I really need one for my work. It's hard to put together flyers and invites for my business when I don't have all right programs and a computer that works.


Makeup and a Makeup Case - I really want new makeup. I don't wear it much so I don't even know what I like anymore. I mean besides MAC. I get by with my Studio Fix, black eyeliner, mascara, and lip gloss. Also I have bought a few new things and now I need a real makeup case or bag to hold it all in. Jr and I saw some really cute sets at Walmart and when I went back to buy them they no longer had them. Boo!

Cardinals Jersey

Boots - I have always loved boots and every year I say I am going to buy them and never do. This will be my year for boots!
Forever 21 has cute Over the Knee boots. And for the western girl in me there's these! And how cute are these little things?!

Walmart has cute affordable boots too! Here, Here, and Here!

New Purse

Coach - I love these two... Here and Here.

Walmart - Again with the cute stuff at Wally World... I like this!

Clothes - Shopping Spree Please! I want a new coat and some skinny jeans. Among other things.

That's all I can think of right now! I pretty much want everything. But what's new?

In Case You Didn't Notice...

I cut my hair.



That is all.

:)

Twenty-Five Things

My cousin Jessica tagged a bunch of us on Facebook. And my cousin Alexis did this on her blog... so I decided to post mine here instead too!

So here it goes... easy peasy...

25 random things about me:


1.)I always thought I didn't want kids until I was almost 30... and I am 25 years old with 4 kids.


2.) I really hate to exercise


3.) My favorite vegetable is broccoli... I can seriously eat it steamed with every meal.


4.) I am obsessed with the Twilight Series. I love me some vampires and werewolves.


5.) I am definitely a Daddy's Girl... I still think he's the best thing on Earth!


6.) My least favorite chore is laundry, in my house the pile NEVER ends... just when I think I've washed everything a new pile emerges.


7.) I HATE shaving my legs... BIGTIME!


8.) I love Country music... it's pretty much all I listen to. And my favorite song right now is Keith Urban's "Til Summer Comes Around"


9.) I am addicted to my shows... 90210, Melrose Place, 16 & Pregnant, Fresh Meat 2, and The Secret Life of the American Teenager




10.) If I could go to school for photography I would take that opportunity in a heartbeat. I would love to be a professional photographer.


11.) I LOVE Coach purses!


12.) I am obsessed with planning parties. Maybe I will look into one day working for an event planning company.


13.) Jr gave me this stuffed puppy for Valentine's Day this year and I am rather attached to it... it sleeps with me.

14.) I live in a fairytale world where I am the Princess and I always get what I want. And I really believe this too.


15.) My ultimate dream in life would be to buy back the house I grew up in and remodel it to make it my "dream home".

16.) Blogging is one of my most favorite things to do.


17.) I would really like to join a playgroup especially since the summer is coming and I want to stay busy... plus it's fun to talk to other Moms once in a while instead of myself or a 7/4/2 year old.


18.) My favorite movie of all time is Walk The Line.
"I want a love like Johnny and June, Rings of fire burnin' with you, I wanna walk the line, til the end of time, I wanna love, love ya that much, cash it all in, give it all up, and when you're gone I wanna go too, like Johnny and June."


19.) My favorite Disney Characters and Ariel and Belle. But Lightning McQueen and Tinkerbell are up there too.



20.) I want to re-new my wedding vows in Vegas at our 5 year anniversary... which is in 2012. Jr wants to plan a church wedding instead. I don't think that will happen.



21.) I am addicted to Facebook


22.) My phone is the Droid Eris


23.) I don't care how much of a hot mess she is... I still love Britney Spears... and I secretly wish her and Justin would end up back together.


24.) My feet are claustrophobic. I can't sleep with my feet covered it annoys me. No socks, no blanket. You will rarely see me wearing shoes that require me to wear socks... and if I do I won't wear them for very long. BUT I love to buy and collect cute socks!


25.) I hate swimming.


Now it's your turn! If you've read this blog, you must make a list of 25 random facts about yourself! It's fun!:)