Christmas!

The anticipation of Christmas had finally arrived! And now it's gone...

We celebrate on Christmas Eve and I was getting ready for that evening my sister and brother-in-law Loyiel gave me my gift early. And I was so excited!

I got my 4th pillowpet and the one I have been wanting for a while now.


See, I absolutely LOVE the movie Despicable Me. Like love love LOVE it. Just ask anyone. I quote this movie in my daily life all the time. (But then again when don't I quote movies?) I even taught Atalie how to say Popoy hahaha! And in the movie, if you haven't seen it, the little girl wants a unicorn toy (popoy) and when she sees it she says "It's so fluffy I'm gonna die!"

Well one day we were at Walmart and I saw it (I have a fascination with Pillowpets anyway) and I screamed, "It's so fluffy I'm gonna die!" and ran over to it and hugged it and begged for it. Just like in the movie. Well the boys (my hubby and his brother) did not buy it for me because my hubby had just bought me the zebra one. And I was sad.

But moral is, I am sad no longer because I have it! And I named her Agnes after the little girl in the movie. And my brother-in-law says he has done his good deed for the year. Better late than never... considering there's only a week left.

Anywho... we got ready and headed over to dinner at my aunts house. Our plan was to make it to Mass at church but due to technical difficulties we didn't make it and I was pretty bummed.

So my husband decided to show me some love to make me feel better.


But while we waited we took advantage and I got a few pictures of my minions all dressed up! (Wait, that was another Despicable Me reference...)






And the baby girls of the family stopped long enough to get ONE picture of them... Miss Laila and Miss Atalie Belle Pepper


And I had to bribe Talie with a cookie to pose for this one with me... but she is a good little poser.


My baby boy and my Pops


My Sisterface, My Pops, and Me!


Not too long before midnight we came back to my house to see what Santa left for us! And boy was that room full of stuff!

The kids literally oohed and aahed when they walked in the front door... and Atalie quickly ran up to her pink car! I don't know how she knew it was even hers... but Daddy stuck her right in.


Then we all opened our gifts. We made out pretty great. the kids were happy... beyond happy. I was happy because my hubby got me a few things I have been wanting.

I loved watching my kids faces light up. And most of all I loved watching Atalie open gifts because I thought she wouldn't know what to do. And literally whispered Wow every time she found out what was behind the paper :)


Diego got tons of Cardinal gear and some outdoor toys. We steered clear of electronics or video games. Alayna had a Lalaloopsy Christmas. She is obsessed and I think I love them just as much now! Arielle had a Disney Princess theme going on. And she is the biggest Disney Princess fan. And Atalie got a few cute things and the best $5 I've ever spent... on a magnadoodle. That girl loves to draw (just look at my walls) and she still has yet to put down that magnadoodle. She even sleeps with it.




Christmas day for me is always chill and play with all the new toys day. My brother was given a ham from work and so he my brother-in-law cooked it up and we went to have dinner at their house.


It was a beautiful day and the weather was fantastic that we played outside all afternoon! My 2 oldest and my nephew got roller blades and so they learned really quickly how to use them! And Atalie got to ride around in her new car.



My baby girls are so beautiful. These two are literally my sunshines.


Arielle thinks she IS Rapunzel and I knew she'd love this gift.



While my niece Laila took a turn in Tal's car... she played with one of Laila's toys and didn't like that Uncle Oscar was trying to play too...


I had to go inside to finish making the mashed potatoes for lunch and the 3 older kids on blades kept coming in and out of the house. I repeatedly told them to go back outside because they would slip on the tile. They had never been on roller blades before and I knew someone was bound to slip and fall. And I was right... Alayna tried going over to get some water and slipped but grabbed onto the water dispenser and knocked it over on top of her. The whole 5 gallon jug landed on her head. Poor girl.


But Grandpa makes everything better.


And then we ate our delicious dinner :) Yum!


And Arielle HAD to sit on the same seat as her brother... even when there was extra chairs. That girls idolizes him. And I love that he just lets her as long as it makes her happy. I kept asking her to give him his own chair and he kept telling me that he was fine :)


After dinner we opened up my Just Dance 3 game for the Wii and danced. I still remain the Queen of that game. I rock!

And then we came home where my husband spent the whole night assembling all the kids gifts. While I watched The Grinch!


We had the best Christmas! My kids are enjoying all their gifts. And we're enjoying spending all our time together just hanging out playing.

Tonight my husband, the kids, and I played on the Wii for almost 2 hours. It was so much fun :) I love family time... and the holidays bring us even closer together.

Mama, You're The Queen of My Heart

I have been trying to start this post all day and instead I am just sitting here staring at this picture I uploaded and the white blankness underneath. Trying to find the right words to express what I feel today and everyday. But truth is there isn't the right words for me to even begin to portray what life is like. So I guess I will just start with the random thoughts I have had running through my head.

My Grandmother (my Mom's Mom) passed away when I was just 2 years old. Although I got to meet her, I never knew her. When I was old enough to realize and ask questions I asked about her. All I knew is she had died. But my Mom never offered any information about her. And at a young age I always had the feeling of don't ask about her because my Mom didn't want to talk about her. She never talked about her. And the things I did hear would be when I would hear random stories of my Mom's childhood and she or someone else mentioned her. As I grew I began to somewhat piece together what type of person she was. I knew she was loud and wasn't afraid to whoop some ass when it came to her kids being bad, my brother being bad, and to anyone in the neigborhood that dare mess with her family. She was a seamstress. She made my Mom's wedding dress. She made all my Mom's clothing. My Mom was the oldest and the only girl for 10 years until my aunt came along. So my Mom was very spoiled and her Mom made sure she had a new outfit for every occassion and all the new styles before anyone else did. She could cook! She was stubborn and had a temper. Her favorite holiday was Christmas and she went ALL OUT every year. I knew this because when I was a child my Mom was rarely "there" for Christmas. Christmas always reminded of my Grandma and so until she had Grandchilden, Christmas was a holiday that didn't bring her any spirit. My Grandma took very good care of her family. She was a giver and very much the head of her family. And that's easy to picture because that was MY MOM. Minus the fact that my Mom couldn't sew. So picturing my Grandma was usually pretty easy because I feel like I lived with her clone. At least that's what I have always imagined in my head. But that's really all I knew.

When I was a teenager, I decided to ask again. I had so many questions in my head. When was her birthday? I knew she was a scorpio because my Mom had mentioned a few times that her and her Mom both butted heads alot because they were both scorpios. When did she die? What did she die from? What was her favorite color? Did she like to dance? Sing? Do anything else besides sew? I mean I really knew nothing about her. She did eventually tell me that her birthday was November 15th. But really that was it. And I was always too afraid to ask her more because I always felt her hesitation when I brought her up. Mainly I wanted to know her. I wanted to know the woman who always brought a look of pain to my Mom's eyes when her name was brought up. And I always wondered... How did my Mom deal with that?

I have always ALWAYS known my Mom to be this strong woman. Fiercely independent. A woman not to mess around with. A woman who wasn't afraid to tell you the truth even if it was hurtful. A stubborn, sometimes short tempered woman. For a woman her size she packed a big punch for sure. But a woman to show emotion? No. Rarely. I never saw my Mom cry. I never saw her be sad. She hid it well. At least to us... because now that I look back as an adult. I know she did cry... and probably a lot. Probably in her room at night when we weren't around. And I always used to think to myself. She must really have a lot of grief because she never shared her memories of her. Of course she would! She was 24 years old when it happened! 24 years old! And although married with 2 chilren she was just a baby herself. Who could be ready to lose their Mother at 24 years old?! That always stuck with me.

It stuck with me so much so that on my 25th birthday I woke up to my husband telling me Happy Birthday... and I opened my eyes and the first thing out of my mouth was, "I am 25. I am past the age my Mom was when her Mom died." Why I evenn said that is beyond me. I didn't look at it as an accomplishment but I did think... I still feel like a child. My Mama still does everything for me when I mess up. She is still here to pick me up when my world is crashing down around me. She is still here for me to make sure I take my medicine when I am sick. She makes sure I have liquid because she knows even though I am 25 I can't swallow pills. And if I have to take a pill she is still here to crush the pill in between two spoons and mix it with water and force feed it to me like a baby. I was pregnant with the 4th baby at the time and she was there to rub my feet, my back, put my shoes on and tie them so i wouldn't have to bend down. Buy me anything I wanted to eat when I wanted it because to her a pregnant woman's cravings should never be left unsatisfied. She was literally my everything even though she would get so mad at me and tell me I was a Daddy's girl who was spoiled rotten and I didn't deserve it. She never failed to tell me that middle children should be the neglected ones and not spoiled. But she went ahead and continued spoiling me anyway. I knew with her as mad as she would get at me... and boy I could get her to yell at me a lot... she would always love me. So on my 25th birthday I sat and thought... Now I don't understand how she could have handled losing her Mom when I was at the same age. It seemed like in was absolutely impossible to live through.

And then it happened, exactly 2 months after my 25th birthday and just 3 days before Christmas my own world came crashing down on me and I was in that very same position. And yes... it did seem like it was something that was impossible to live through. Losing a parent, a loved one, but especially a Mother brings you pain to a level you didn't even know existed. A pain that is so indescriable that you just have to have lived it be able to even understand. People say they can relate... and to some degree this is true if they've ever lost someone close to them... but I also would think... "No you can't. You've never lost a parent. There is no way you can relate." The only feeling I can imagine being the same, if not worse, is losing your own child. Then tell me you know what I am feeling. And to have a loss that was so completely unexpected is even worse. I now understand what people who lose loved ones in accidents must feel. One day everything is fine and in the blink of an eye you're whole life is altered. I would never wish this pain on my worst enemy. Living every day with a void in your heart that could never be filled. A happiness that you will never get back. And a tear in your eye that will never go away. I understand there is a far greater plan, everything happens for a reason, but it's still totally and completely unfair.

There's not a day that goes by that I don't think of my Mama. Not a day that passes that I don't try and preserve her memory for the sake of my children. In the two years that have passed I have learned this. Time passes in the blink of an eye. Life goes on and yes it is still beautiful. There is still so much to be excited about, to be happy about, to be thankful for, and above all you don't get but one life to live. Good and bad we can't look back but only go forward. My Mom definitely taught me that and still it whether she knows that or not. And from her I have learned that I never want to keep anything about her from my children. I want them to know everything they want to know about her. I want them to always know her because they are too small to have the memories. And she was worth knowing! And as ironic as it may be... my Mom hated Christmas because it was her Mom's favorite holiday... I love Christmas even more now because my Mom passed 3 days prior. As if I don't already have enough to celebrate that season for... it's even better to celebrate my Mom's life as well.

So Merry Christmas Mama. I miss you more than ever. And I love you to infinity and beyond.

A Month to Celebrate

Birthdays that is!

Our Goddaughter Arianna turned 4! Waaah! Her last birthday as an only child because my BFF is pregnant with a boy now who will also be our 2nd Godchild.


Nino loves to pester her...


And although she loved her cake... she did NOT like when we sang to her. It was too loud.


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My aunt Kika turned... well she turned 29 I believe ;)And she looked hot might I add!


You know it's a great night when we have a stripper pole in our VIP area!


My love and I enjoyed our night out. With 4 kids they're hard to come by.


We did lots of dancing! And my husband DOESN'T dance! So this made me one happy happy wife! Because I love to dance. And obviously us girls love us a Jr sandwich!


And my 21 year old little cousins who we can finally party with joined us! Beautiful aren't they?




Of course a bathroom photo session is in order... well it wasn't planned but in our family we travel in packs to the bathroom. When one needs to go... we all go! And this is what usually ends up taking place...


And my Mom's best friend Denise showed up. We've known her since we were little little girls... like I think I was about 6 years old.


And before we left for the night... we got this picture. I love it because it's my Mom's 2 daughters, her best friend, and her only sister. If Mom were here she would have been in it.


As I got to my car that Jr (our DD) had pulled around to the front (because it was freezing) for us he handed me a rose that he bought outside of the club we were at. My husband is so romantical. He truly made my night a good one. And we had fun celebrating with my aunt!


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My nephew Joey turned 2!



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My nephew Ducky turned 7!


Phew! Yup birthday are NEVER ENDING in this family... and we love to celebrate :) Party on Wayne!

THE TOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN!

DISNEY ON ICE PRESENTS DISNEY•PIXAR’S TOY STORY 3
IS COMING TO PHOENIX, JANUARY 18 - 22 US AIRWAYS CENTER!

Toy Story 3, the Academy Award®-winning smash hit blockbuster, is so hot it’s cool as everyone’s favorite toys take to the ice in Disney On Ice presents Disney•Pixar’s Toy Story 3! An accomplished creative team and a cast of world-class skaters are bringing Woody, the pull-string cowboy; space ranger Buzz Lightyear; Jessie, the yodeling cowgirl; and the rest of the Toy Story gang to fans and families around the country in this all-new, high-energy ice spectacular.

Inspired by the #1 animated movie of all time, Toy Story 3, and memorable moments from Toy Story and Toy Story 2, everyone’s favorite characters are hitting the ice in this sensational live production coming to your hometown! Catch all the heroic action when Buzz Lightyear, Woody, Jessie and the Toy Story gang escape from the rambunctious tots of Sunnyside Daycare and race for home, in their most daring adventure ever. Plus a few new faces join the fun, including Barbie’s groovy bachelor Ken and Lots-o’-Huggin’ Bear. It’s the biggest Toy Story experience ever on ice, jam-packed with fast-paced adventure such as Buzz’s galactic battle with Emperor Zurg and a hoe-down on the set of “Woody’s Roundup.” Relive the humor, friendship and charm of Toy Story when Disney On Ice presents Disney•Pixar’s Toy Story 3 takes family fun to infinity and beyond!

Showtimes:
Wednesday, January 18th – 7:30 p.m.
Thursday, January 19th – 7:30 p.m.
Friday, January 20th – 10:30 a.m. and 7:30 p.m.
Saturday, January 21st – 11:30 a.m., 3:30 p.m. & 7:30 p.m.
Sunday, January 22nd – 1:30 p.m. & 5:30 p.m.

Ticket price levels are $14, $18, $25, $40 (VIP) and $68 (Front Row). Opening Night tickets available for “Buy One Get One Free” (excluding Front Row and VIP seating areas and limited to 6 per order). Tickets are available online at Ticketmaster.com, by calling 800-745-3000 or at the venue Box Office.

US Airways Center – 201 E. Jefferson Street, Phoenix, AZ 85004

I will be at the opening night showing! Maybe I will see some of you there?!

To discover more about Disney On Ice, go to www.DisneyOnIce.com, or visit us on Facebook and YouTube.

Decorating Our Home for Christmas!

I love the Christmas season! So as tradition we don't put up our tree until the day after Thanksgiving. And for me that's too long to wait. It would have been up before halloween if it were up to me. But I like that fact that we have a special day that we put up all our decorations as a family.

I happened to have a tree from last year... then a few month ago I also inherited a tree from my aunt. Both fake. One with colored lights one with white lights. But I happened to my mention to my dear sweet husband that I liked the look of an all white tree with the red/white/silver color scheme I wanted this year. And he went out and bought me one even though I told him many times to save the money when we had 2 perfectly good trees to choose from. Bless his heart he never listens to me. But seeing as we had a new white tree we needed new ornaments.

We went to Walmart and I am thinking of course of my red/white/silver snowflakes and icicle tree in my head when lo and behold Jr decides he wants a blue theme. Since when does he want to have an opinion around here? I am thinking "When I want your opinion I will give it to you"... but he fought me on it. My Mom has always done blue and silver so I am kinda all blued out ya know? But he went on and on about how he wanted it to be different and not traditional red or green.

Bah Humbug!

So I suggested if he wanted to be different then he should give me the pink tree I haave wanted for years. And I found pink ornaments. Well since we couldn't decide I took the kids on a walk through the toy aisle and he came back with a box of pink ornaments, a box of teal ornaments and a set of purple high heeled ornaments. I about died! Not only did he compromise but he found purple heels! Purple heels have a lot of meaning for us but long story short my Mom was buried in purple high heels. Needless to say I was ecstatic! And since we couldn't on tree toppers either, I love stars and ONLY stars, and he likes the Angels but I think they look creepy... I found a large purple snowflake ornament with a photo opening and snuck it into the cart. When we the firs thing I did was print a picture of my Mom and stuck it in there.

And the festivities began...

The Hubby putting up the tree
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And the kids had a ball (no pun intended) putting all the ornaments on






And Atalie had fun just staring at it...


And then it was complete and we were happy!




And lastly we hung up the stocking after decorating all the other walls.


And lastly we hung up our lists... in hopes that some of these things Santa will be kind enough to bring us!

Thanksgiving

This was the 2nd Thanksgiving without my Mom. So much has changed. It used to be a Holiday where my Mom's side of the family got together and we had a great time. It was my Mom's favorite holiday because she loved to cook. So naturally cooking a huge feast for all the people she loved was her greatest joy. I on the other hand never cared for the Holiday. I mean, it does remind me I have a lot to be thankful for, which I am. But I only looked forward to eat to eat the delicious food. But with my Mom as my Mother I had delicious food every day of my life so for me it was more just seeing the joy on her face and the fun we had with our family.

In our family my Mom was the main cook for this Holiday as well. Sure my aunt would bring a little dish or a pie or two. But mostly it was just her. You know how in some families as soon a girl gets old enough to help she get into the kitchen with all the women to prepare the feast. Well that never happened to me. Even though I take after my Mom and am a fantastic cook (yes I really do think this of myself... if there's one thing I can do well and admit it whole heartedly... it's that I am an awesome cook) I never had to help out in the kitchen. When Mom was in her groove it was kinda like Cinderella when the animals magically clean up a whole room. Well pots and spoons danced in our kitchen to whatever beat she was playing because walking in would just be an interuption. Yes it was that magical. To this day even when I cook, it boggles my mind how that woman could multi-task when cooking 10 things at once and never burn a thing. I cook daily and I carefully have to watch my food and not try and multi-task too much or chaos can ensue. But my Mama... she was pure magic. And the food was always without a doubt the best we ever tasted.

So this 2nd year without her was particularly weird for me. As I have mentioned there have been many changes. Last Thanksgiving, (year one without her) was more everyone trying to keep tradition alive. Doing it for my Mom. So she could be proud of the family she lead. And I think we did just that. But this year was more of a branching out for our family as a whole. So many people were missing from our celebration. New ones were added. And even though it was a great time. It wasn't the same. And since like I've mentioned before, Thanksgiving never has been quite the big deal to me, it would have been quite alright to have skipped the whole holiday and go right to Black Friday! Or I would have probably been happier to stay at home just my husband and kids and watch movies all night. And I told my husband that for next year we need a new plan. Because I don't want to skip this holiday. It reminds me of my Mama. And I want to make a new tradition to make me love it once again. To find the joy in it besides just being thankful for all the blessings I have in my life. Because I am thankful for those everyday as I live them.

So maybe you can tell me what makes your Thanksgiving special... I am up for new ideas!

One great thing I love about family get togethers though is all the pictures I take!

Blessed with 4 amazing little people


Atalie, Arielle, Alayna, and Diego


Mama and Son


My Little Tiny Lady


Tal loves her Grandpa


And this is my beautiful family!


I told you I am a lucky girl!